Unfortunately, I have not found the place that sells parenting skills. It cannot be downloaded from the internet. Parenting skills are acquired over time through experience. The biggest problem is that we tend to replicate how we were raised by our parents. Good or bad, this is not the best way to become a good parent. You have your own individual characteristics and personality coupled with your own strengths and weaknesses. You must learn to parent your own way. An important method to use is rediscovering your inner child or trying to remember what it was like being a child. There will be times when you need to express your disapproval of your child’s actions and attitude, but you do not want to do this in a way that will traumatize your child.
Raising a child is unquestionably a life long commitment. Even after all of your children have grown up and left the house, they will still come to you for guidance. They have to learn that there are consequences for every decision they make. Parenting never stops, whether you realize it or not.
As early as one, your child can start learning independence. You may still think that giving your child what they want is the way to go. Frequently, it is out of your own desire to be liked and sometimes from your own wish that they be spared some of the bad experiences you had as a child. You want to give them the best of everything. This will not achieve anything positive in the long run. Your child will not learn to be responsible and will take advantage of you throughout their life.
Your child, however, should be given acceptance with abundant and unconditional love. You should show your child affection. They tend to be kinder, charitable and best of all responsible. The opposite is true for the parents that gave their children every materialistic want and satisfied every whim. The child becomes immature and selfish. There are several methods you can try. You can put a marble in a jar every time your child starts doing something the first time you ask. When the jar is full, you can have an agreed upon reward that is not monetary. A family outing to the zoo, a trip to Six Flags, any activity that your child will enjoy is better rewards than simply handing him or her money.
If your child wants to argue, do not allow it. You have to remain calm and repeat the rule over and over again. Rules are not up for debate. A timeout is an option, open discussion is for another time. Also, the dinner table is not the place for arguing either. Arguing while eating is physically and emotionally unhealthy. Your goal should be to produce many long lasting good memories while sharing a meal with your family. They should look forward to more of these moments together and enjoying family time. Establish some points or topics for your conversation.
As children, we never wanted ridiculed or scorned. There is no use going back down your own school days and taking it out on your children. Although well intended, helping your child with their homework should be avoided. You will probably find yourself lost and not even understand, since the teaching methods have even changed. Homework is your child’s responsibility. Most parents often think that they know better and that is the biggest part of the problem, we actually don’t. We often disregard ideas simply because of where it originated. Give your child some freedom, so that they can start learning how to be responsible for themselves.
Michael Hunter
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Honest parenting is the difference between a program and a real parenting style that builds a relationship and causes lasting improvement in your child or teen! This information is for all parents and caretakers of children!
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